Everyone would want to be more likeable if they had the chance. Today I’m teaching you a simple way to be more likeable. Just one important strategy. No tricks, no gimmicks. If you’re ready we’re starting now.

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The simple way to get people to like you is don’t respond, anticipate.

Don't respond, anticipate comes in three parts. 

To do this properly, we need to do the following.

The first is to read the room (location)

Where are you and where is the participant? Let’s say you’re on your way back from your morning jog and you’re walking back into your building. You are aware of your surroundings and location as well as your proximity to the potential participants.

The second step is to read the potential communication participant (what are they currently doing saying without you being in the picture)

What are the people involved currently doing or saying without your being in the picture? This is your observation as a bystander, not as a participant. There is one potential communication participant, your first floor neighbor, speaking to the doorman from inside her apartment. And then there’s the doorman with whom she’s speaking, so the doorman is another potential communication participant.

The third step is to read the situation (what are you doing, what are they doing)

Do you have your headphones still on as you’re approaching your building? Is it unclear that you are listening to something because your earbuds are subtle and inconspicuous, easy to miss. What are the other participants doing? Are they chatting to each other and then looking to greet you as you walk into the building?

So those are the three steps to don't respond, anticipate.

Before responding, if necessary, you’re first anticipating the situation by reading the room, reading the potential participants, and reading the situation. This will allow you to anticipate their reaction and your response.

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Let’s look at two examples.

In the first one, the person is not following the “Don't respond, anticipate” likeability rule.

If you breeze by them without taking your headphones off you don’t end up saying hello or stopping to chat briefly with either the first floor neighbor or the doorman. And that doesn’t leave the best impression. If they were to greet you but you were still listening to your audiobook that you didn’t hear them, then you are definitely not making it easy to be likeable in that moment. 

However in the second example the person is following the “Don't respond, anticipate” likeability rule.

As they walk up to the building, they are aware of their surroundings. They’re approaching the building where there are two people in a light conversation. The first floor neighbor who’s elderly and probably a bit lonely, and then the jovial doorman. They notice that they have their earbuds in so they take them out and pause their audiobook. They make eye contact with the first floor neighbor and the doorman. Instead of breaking the flow of their conversation, they allow the participants to say hello. At that point, they also greet both the neighbor and the doorman. Likeability is on point in this scenario. Way to go.

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It’s one simple strategy to instantly make you more likeable. Remember the likeability rule “Don't respond, anticipate” and the three steps it comprises. Read the room by paying attention to your location and your surroundings. Read the person, aka the potential communication participant by figuring out what they are currently doing. And lastly, read the situation. What do you anticipate they’ll be saying when you are in the picture? Will they say hello? Will they ask you for the time? Anticipate before responding. So that’s the likeability rule you can take anywhere and everywhere with you to level up the likeability factor!

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Alright Explearners that’s it from me today. If you liked this video be sure to give it a big thumbs up. Can you think of any other ways to increase likeability? Share that with the Explearning community in the comments down below. And if you want to help our channel continue to grow, share this lesson and our channel with anyone who wants to improve their communication skills and social skills. I’ll see you in the next one! Happy Explearning :) 

About the Author and the Explearning Academy:

Mary Daphne is an expert in communication, executive interpersonal skills, and personal development. She is the founder of the Explearning Academy, a platform dedicated to helping individuals enhance their social fluency, boost their careers, and elevate their social game. Through immersive group coaching programs like the Executive Communication Lab and self-guided journeys, participants gain the social superpowers and career catapults they've been searching for. If you're ready to take your negotiation skills to the next level and connect with like-minded individuals, visit academy.explearning.co and explore the various plans available. Join the Explearning Academy community and unlock your full potential.

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