Hello, Explearners. Welcome back. Have you ever found yourself in the middle of a conversation only to see the other person's eyes glaze over? Or maybe you've been at a party and you just can't seem to keep the conversation flowing. If that sounds like you, then stick around because today we're going to tackle a topic that's going to change your social life forever.
Here's how to stop being boring. If you're ready, let's get to it.
Let's start with a little secret. Everyone has been boring at some point or another. Yes, even I. But the good news is, being interesting is a skill that you can learn and improve. And the very first step is understanding why we sometimes come across as boring. According to a study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, one of the main reasons people perceive others as boring is due to a lack of presence.
That's right, not being fully engaged in the conversation can make you seem dull. So our first strategy is to be present. Being present means actively listening and responding to the other person. It's about showing genuine interest in what they're saying. For example, instead of just nodding along, you could say, that's really interesting.
Can you tell me more about that? Or how did you feel when that happened? These kinds of responses show that you're fully engaged and interested In the conversation. Another reason people might find us boring sometimes is because we're not sharing enough about ourselves. A study from Harvard university found that sharing about ourselves activates the same pleasure centers in the brain as food and money.
So our second strategy is to share your story. Sharing your stories doesn't mean that you have to have climbed Mount Everest or swam with sharks. It's about sharing your unique perspective and experiences. For example, instead of saying, I like movies, you could say, I love movies. I recently watched this indie film that made me see things from a completely different perspective.
Have you seen any good movies lately? Do you see the difference there? All right, and our third strategy is based on a study from the University of Cambridge, which found that people who ask more questions, particularly follow up questions, are perceived as more likable. So our third strategy is to ask more questions.
Follow up questions show that you're not only listening, but you're also interested in knowing more. For example, if someone tells you that they went hiking over the weekend, you could ask, That sounds fun. What trail did you hike? How was the view from the top? Did you have to wake up super early to get there?
Our fourth strategy is to be mindful of your social media use. You might be wondering how does social media fit into all of this? Well, a study titled Social Media Use and Impact on Interpersonal Communication found that social media usage can actually affect the development of interaction and communication skills for young adults.
Being mindful of your social media use means being aware of how much time you're spending on social media and how it's affecting your real life interactions. For example, if you find yourself constantly checking your phone during conversations, it might be some time to set some boundaries. Try setting specific times for checking social media and stick to them.
This can help you to be more present during your real life interactions. Our fifth and final strategy comes from a study titled analysis, influence factors of domination, competency, and interpersonal skills in the stakeholder interaction to infrastructure project success. This study found that competency is a significant variable, which influences the success of interaction.
So our fifth strategy is to continuously improve your competency. Improving your competency means continuously learning and growing in your areas of interest and in your industry, this not only makes you more competent, but also more interesting to talk to. For example, if you're passionate about photography.
You could take a photography class or read photography books. This will not only improve your photography skills, but also give you more interesting things to talk about in your conversations. Now I know what you're thinking. These strategies sound great, but how can I practice them? Well, I've got just the place for you.
Explearning Academy. It's our very own communication community where we have live workshops each and every week. And opportunities to practice speaking and communicating and sharing our ideas. It's a safe space to try out these strategies that I shared with you here today to decrease your social anxiety and to boost your confidence, to reach social fluency.
And you can sign up by going to academy. exploring. co hope to see you there. So there you have it five actionable strategies to stop being boring. Be present, share your stories, ask more questions, be mindful of social media use, and continuously improve your competency. Remember, being interesting is a skill, and like any skill, it takes practice.
So don't be too hard on yourself. Keep practicing, keep improving, and I promise you that you will see a difference. And remember, if you need a place to practice, Explearning Academy is here for you. We are a global community of learners just like you, all working together to improve our communication and social skills to reach social fluency.
So what are you waiting for? Start practicing these strategies today and say goodbye to being boring. Thanks so much for watching and joining me. And as always, keep learning, keep exploring, and keep Explearning. I'll see you in the next one.