In this livestream we do a deep dive into Romantic Competence, a term coined by Professor of Psychology, Dr. Joanne Davila and her team of researchers.

Insight, Multuality, and Emotion Regulation are the three core skills for healthy romantic relationships.

Insight is understanding yourself and your needs. This will help equip you to find a partner you're worthy of and who is worthy of you. If you know yourself, you know what you want in a partner. Often people rush into relationships just to say they are in a relationship, even if it's not right for them. It's better to embrace singledom for a while, figure out what you want from yourself and what you seek in a partner. Think about the values you want your partner to espouse and how their qualities and characteristics can complement your own. So, as easy as it is to say "know thyself" really take time to figure this one out before your jump into a relationship. Because once you know yourself, you'll be able to share with your partner what your purpose in life is.

Mutuality is knowing that you should care for your partner and treat their needs just as important as your own. It's the understanding that they are an individual with their own dreams, goals, and objectives and that as a loving partner you should support these aspirations. It's the idea that you can lean on them and they can lean on you. The way we like to think of healthy relationships are as two trees with strong trunks and roots, growing side by side and as they grow their twigs and branches twine with each other. They are individuals standing on their own two feet, with their fingers interlacing. Their to support and love one another. This is the ultimate for relationship goals: you make each other better but are still yourself. 

Emotion Regulation. This is a biggie. It's probably the hardest skill to master on this list. If you're able to have the presence of mind in tough situations where emotions are heated, words are careless flown left and right, and some things were said that shouldn't have been then wow, good on you. The better you know how someone pushes your buttons and what your emotional triggers are, you're better able to prevent those scenarios from happening. This will get easier in time and with ample practice but once you know what really makes you tick, you can foresee any possible tiff or argument. Self-awareness enables us to regulate our emotions and be in control. We understand that our emotions and reactions have ramifications. The next time you get angry, look at yourself in the mirror. You don't want to subject your partner to that, do you? See what an utter monstrosity anger is and how it is 100% avoidable with emotion regulation. 

If you would like to hear more about Romantic Competence, check out this lesson here.

Happy Explearning ⚡

About the Author and the Explearning Academy:

Mary Daphne is an expert in communication, executive interpersonal skills, and personal development. She is the founder of the Explearning Academy, a platform dedicated to helping individuals enhance their social fluency, boost their careers, and elevate their social game. Through immersive group coaching programs like the Executive Communication Lab and self-guided journeys, participants gain the social superpowers and career catapults they've been searching for. If you're ready to take your negotiation skills to the next level and connect with like-minded individuals, visit academy.explearning.co and explore the various plans available. Join the Explearning Academy community and unlock your full potential.

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